Valentine
Humour
 Valentine
for an ex spouse...
A man goes to the store
to buy Valentine's cards for his daughter and mother.
The 50 feet of displays for hundreds of cards astounds him.
He mutters out loud, "I wonder if they have cards for ex-spouses?"
A clerk, standing in the
next isle, overhears the man and says,
"Yes sir, we do have an 'ex' category, but they're in Sporting
Goods."
"Really... you must
be kidding me right?"
"No sir, replies the
clerk... I wouldn't kid you."
"Just hop over to sporting goods and ask for 'Bullets'..."
After she woke up,
a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave
me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What do you think it
means?"
"You'll know on Valentine's
Day." he said.
On Valentine's Day, the
man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife.
Delighted, she opened it to find a book entitled....
"The Meaning Of Dreams."
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Q: What did the mushroom say about her Valentine's date?
A: He's a fungi
Q: What does the gorilla
call his Valentine?
A: His prime mate
 Mafia
Valentine's Day Greetings
My love for you...
it came and went.
So your feet are now
in wet cement.
I'm here to fulfill
your fondest wishes
Now that your husband
sleeps with the fishes.
Lie down with
me
It's my final offa,
Or you'll be lying
wit' Jimmy Hoffa.
I picked up this
card
from a slim selection,
But that's all they offer
in witness protection.
Love, J. Doe
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Country Patch Collection
- Kims
Whim
©
Ulla-Jane - 2002
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