STANDING
BETWEEN LOVE AND BETRAYALSTANDING
BETWEEN LOVE AND BETRAYAL
Teaspoon is sitting at his desk trying to work around Jimmy’s propped up feet that are resting on the one corner of his desk. Teaspoon latches onto a piece of paper that is being held down onto the desk by Jimmy’s big boots. Teaspoon tries yanking the paper out from under the boots and in the process tears the paper in half. He looks up disgusted with Jimmy who is paying no mind to what Teaspoon is doing. Jimmy is casually reading through paperwork concerning Cody’s murder investigations.
Jimmy senses Teaspoon’s watchful eyes on him. He glances up at Teaspoon to see the impatience written on the marshal’s face. Teaspoon silently holds up the half of the paper that he did manage to get from under Jimmy’s boots.
“Oh. Sorry.”
“Could you please remove your dirty boots from my desk?” Teaspoon asked behind a mask of calmness.
“Sure,” Jimmy spoke softly as he sits up straight while placing his feet flatly on the floor.
“Jimmy, you’ve been studying those damn papers for the better half of the morning. I don’t think you’re gonna find whatever it is you’re searching for.”
“Teaspoon, I ain’t even sure what it is I’m searching for.”
“Why all the interest all of a sudden in Cody’s investigation?”
Jimmy can’t tell Teaspoon his suspicions about Hannah just yet. He doesn’t even know what the truth is himself concerning Hannah and the murders. He keeps telling himself that it doesn’t make Hannah a cold-blooded killer just because she happens to own a pair of black leather gloves. “I just want to make damn sure that Cody can’t try to reclaim the absurd idea that Buck is the killer he’s looking for. Cody is still in love with Jane. I don’t trust him not to use this investigation to his advantage again.”
“You really think that’s what Cody did when he had Buck arrested?” Teaspoon asked somberly. Teaspoon doesn’t want to believe that Cody would deliberately hurt Buck that way, but then again Cody has always been a little bit on the obsessive side. He was always that way when they were all riding for The Pony Express. If Cody saw an expensive new saddle that he wanted, you can bet that somehow Cody would come up with the money to get it. Teaspoon doesn’t even want to know how many times Cody may have ordered a beer when out on a run instead of sarsaparilla. The women in Cody’s life were another matter. Again, the marshal doesn’t even want to know how many women Cody may have paid to spend an evening with him. Something he is sure none of his other riders had done. As far as Buck and Cody, well the two of them were like night and day back then. That hasn’t changed.
“I do. Where is Cody’s witness that saw Buck commit murder? I’ll tell you where Cody’s witness is. There never was a witness, because Buck never committed murder! I’m sure Cody made the whole story up just so he could keep Buck locked up for a few days far away from Jane.”
“It sure sounds like something Cody would do, but I hope you’re wrong. I would have a difficult time ever forgiving Cody if he deliberately jeopardized Buck’s life like that.”
Both men glance over at the office door when Kid strolls in with a look of worriment etched on his face.
“You look as if you’ve been thinking too hard, Kid,” Jimmy spoke flatly with an annoying grin attached to his face.
Kid walks over to the two men. “I caught Jesse in our barn last evening, and Charlene was in there with him.”
Teaspoon abruptly stands up from his chair. “What?”
“Jesse claimed he was there to steal one of our horses…”
“That’s a surprise,” Jimmy stated with sarcasm.
“He claims that Charlene stumbled upon his attempt in doing so,” Kid spoke frustrated with all the lies and betrayal going on around all of them.
“Now that’s a believable story if ever I heard one,” Jimmy stated with much more sarcasm.
“You’re the one that brought Charlene out to the ranch! I don’t trust her and I think it’s time we sent her back home! Let her father deal with protecting her from Simon Davenport,” Kid stated boldly.
“I would have never saddled Buck with Charlene if I would have known what a deceitful woman she can be. I’m just having a difficult time dealing with her getting nearly beat to death again. You didn’t see her after that first time Kid. Charlene was a mess.”
“She’s wrecking havoc in our lives. As much as I hate to say it, I’m not too sure a trust Cody any further than I can see him. When the two of them are conversing with one another they are always whispering, they’re constantly having dinner together, and they even act guilty to me. I’m telling the both of you that those two are up to no good. Hell it wouldn’t surprise me if Cody were working with Jesse, ” Kid spoke somberly.
“Kid I don’t want you worrying about Cody. I’m keeping my eye on everything he does. You don’t think I accepted his apologize just to be buddies again? I don’t want to fight with Cody, but I sure as hell don’t trust him either,” Jimmy stated flatly.
“I’m going over to Doc Barnes and visit with Buck,” Kid stated with worriment and frustration.
Kid leaves the office and strolls slowly down the street towards Doc Barnes Clinic. Jimmy remains speechless until Kid is out of his sight. He turns to face Teaspoon who is now looking every bit as worried as Kid.
“Kid really seems upset about finding Jesse and Charlene together,” Jimmy stated flatly.
“He’s probably worried because Charlene is residing in his home with his wife and children.”
“I can go back to Buck’s every night if you want to move Charlene out of Kid’s. I don’t have to spend my nights with Hannah when there’s so much going on at the ranch.”
“No. I don’t think I want that woman back at Buck’s. When he’s ready to go back over to his home, I don’t think he’d have much patience for her.”
“Teaspoon, Buck has more patience with women than any man I know.”
“Yeah, I know. But, I think even Buck is starting to get a bit annoyed with Charlene. Besides, Jane and Buck deserve to have some time alone once he’s healed completely. I don’t want Charlene intruding on them any longer.”
Jimmy laughs and shakes his head thinking about Buck and Jane and the way everyone is trying to give them time alone, but still nothing intimately has taken place between the two of them.
Kid walks into Buck’s room with his hands shoved into his front trouser pockets. As soon as he sees Buck though, a smile immediately replaces the frown he came in with.
Buck is sitting up in bed and Jane is sitting on the edge of the bed engaged in a passionate kiss with Buck.
Kid clears his throat. The two lovers either don’t hear him or they are simply ignoring him. Kid clears his throat again a little louder than the first time.
Jane pulls herself away from Buck. The two of them gaze at Kid.
“I’m sorry. I really don’t mean to intrude,” Kid spoke sincerely.
“That’s all right Kid, we’re getting used to people intruding on us,” Jane spoke with a warm smile.
Buck tries to get more comfortable on his bed, but instead he ends up causing himself extreme pain when he tries to move backwards on the bed to sit up better. He grimaces with pain causing Jane to jump off his bed in a hurried fashion. She is at her wits end trying to help him.
“Buck, are you alright?” Jane spoke hysterically.
Kid hurries to Jane and Buck’s aid. “Jane let me handle this for you.”
Jane moves over to make room for Kid next to Buck. Kid takes one of Buck’s pillows and fluffs it up and then gently places it behind Buck. He manages to help Buck move back to lean on the pillow.
Kid turns to Jane. “Why don’t you get some fresh air? Go for a little walk. It can’t be good for you to be cooped up in this room all the time. I’ll stay here with Buck.”
Jane gazes for a reaction from Buck. “Buck?” Jane asked apprehensively.
“Go. You need to get out of here once in awhile. I’ll be fine with Kid,” Buck spoke reassuring Jane that he doesn’t mind that she leaves him for a while.
Jane reaches over Kid and gives Buck a quick kiss. She puts her shawl around her shoulders and makes her way out of Buck’s room.
Buck waits until Jane leaves before saying one word to Kid. “What’s on your mind, Kid?”
Kid turns to his friend and sits down in a chair that usually is occupied by Jane right next to Buck’s bed. “What makes you think I have something on my mind?”
Buck arches his eyebrow at Kid. Kid has seen this look many times before. It is impossible to hide anything from Buck. “How do you do that?”
“Do what?” Buck asked dumfounded.
“You always know when something is amiss.”
“It’s written all over your face, Kid. Now, you mind telling me what it is that’s bothering you.”
Buck, you need your rest. I shouldn’t be troubling you with problems right now.”
“Kid, if you don’t tell me, I’m going to just lie here and worry.”
Kid hesitates a moment. He wonders if telling Buck about Jesse revisiting the ranch and Charlene being out in the barn with Jesse is a good idea. He knows Buck will fret over the news. But Buck will also fret if he doesn’t tell him. And, there’s really no sense in trying to make up some unbelievable lie, because Buck can read right through a lie.
“I don’t want you worrying about this, I can handle it myself.”
“Kid, just tell me what it is that’s troubling you.”
Kid hesitates a moment longer. “All right, but I don’t want you worrying about problems. The problems can wait until you’re well enough to worry about them. “Last night I was having trouble sleeping. I got up and noticed a lantern burning in the barn so I went outside to check it out.”
“Let me guess, you found Jesse out there stealing more of our horses.”
Kid is a little stunned that Buck knew exactly what he was going to say. “Good guess. He did bring one of our horses back though.”
“How thoughtful of him,” Buck stated with a hint of sarcasm.
“I let him go.”
“Why?”
“I had to. He was holding Charlene hostage.”
“Why was Charlene out in the barn that late at night?”
After Jesse left, I asked Charlene that very same question. She claims she couldn’t sleep so she got up out of bed to go for a walk.”
“Do you believe her?”
“I don’t believe anything that woman says. I don’t know how she got mixed up with Jesse, but I’m almost sure she’s working with him.”
“Keep an eye on her Kid. I don’t trust her either.”
Doc Barnes walks into Buck’s room.
“I think Buck needs to get some rest, Kid. You can come back later.”
Kid gets up from his chair “I’ll see you later Buck. Take good care of him for me Doc.”
“Oh, I will. I know how much you all want him back on his feet and completely well again.”
The two of them both look back at Buck, who is sound asleep.
The streets of Rock Creek by mid-morning are just starting to bustle with townsfolk. Some are just strolling from building to building going about their everyday business in town before heading back to their homes. Some are gathering up some supplies at Thompkins Store. Some people, like Jack Morgan, are just simply sticking their nose into the business of what goes on at the jailhouse.
As Jack enters Teaspoon’s office he startles the old marshal almost right out of his chair. Teaspoon had pulled Jesse’s wanted poster off the bulletin board and has been staring at the man intensely.
“I see a man that’s blaming himself for an outlaws wrongdoings,” Jack remarked somberly.
Teaspoon glances up at Jack and then gets up from his chair and hangs Jesse’s poster back up on the bulletin board.
“Jesse wasn’t a bad kid when he came into my life six years ago. I suppose that would be rather difficult for you to believe.”
“He’s near. He hasn’t finished his revenge on your family,” Jack stated somberly.
“I don’t doubt that, Jack.”
“You don’t sound too worried.”
“At the moment I’m more concerned about getting Buck home and completely well again. Once I get that accomplished, then I’ll deal with Jesse.”
“Yes, your deputy,” Jack stated boldly.
“You got something you wanna say Jack?”
“I’ve heard a rumor in town that it’s a possibility that your deputy just may have committed cold-blooded murder a few years back, and that you had no witness to charge him with the murder. Or is it possible that you were just hiding the truth…”
“Leave it be Jack!” Teaspoon spoke rather harshly at his friend from his past, as he’s almost in Jack’s face, his rage for Jack’s meddling in his life reaching the breaking point.
Jack smiles at Teaspoon knowing perfectly well that he’s pushing Teaspoon just a bit too far. He has no intentions of stirring up Buck’s past, he just wanted to see just how close the marshal and his deputy really are. “I’ll leave it be only cause you asked me to so nicely.”
Teaspoon wearily sinks down into his chair.
Jack watches the old man with intensity. It certainly didn’t go unnoticed by Jack at how quickly Teaspoon became fretful over his remarks concerning Buck’s not so innocent past. “Don’t worry Teaspoon, I have no intentions of investigating what happened with Buck. He’s a good man, even with his Kiowa blood. I’m sure that if Buck did commit murder it had to have been because that person had caused Buck a great deal of pain.”
“Can we change the subject? You’ve brought Buck’s name up in conversation before and it worries me. I’m hoping that the reason you showed up in Rock Creek isn’t to hurt the people in my life that I care about. I have Jesse already doing that. Why don’t you tell me more about my past and leave my present family out of our conversations?”
“I’ve told you everything I know.”
“Yeah, you left me in shock the other day after you abruptly announced to me that there’s a child involved. How is it that you happen to know this?” Teaspoon asked sounding as if he doesn’t believe a word Jack says.
“I told you before that those savages held me hostage.”
“Please refrain from calling Indians savages in my presence. I don’t particularly like that word much. There has to be more to this story then you’re telling me, Jack.”
“As I told you they held me hostage. I was there for about six months. I was getting so discouraged about my imprisonment that I could be wrong about the exact amount of time I was made to spend with them.”
“Go on.”
“The Indian men of the village were away from the village on a hunting trip. White men, who looked to be just ordinary trappers like you and I, raided the village. During the attack, I managed to escape. She was with child, Teaspoon.”
“She probably didn’t survive the raid,” Teaspoon spoke quietly.
“She was pretty determined Teaspoon to keep her unborn child safe. I can’t say for sure, but I’d be willing to bet my life that she and her unborn child survived that raid.”
“You know Jack, this is a fine time to bring me this sort of news.”
“I’ve been debating nearly half my life Teaspoon on whether or not I should tell you about the child. Even after I arrived here in Rock Creek and met all your family, I still wasn’t sure. I look at you and all of them, and I see the happiest family that I’ve ever seen in my lifetime. I don’t want this news to cause you any grief. But, if I know you, you’ll do whatever it takes to find this child.”
“There ain’t much I can do, Jack. I have no idea where this child could be if there even is a child. Not to mention the fact that this child would be an adult now. There are so many possibilities here. The woman could have survived the attack, but perhaps she didn’t survive the next time her village was attacked. Even if the child were born, he or she could be gone from this earth by now. Unless I have something else to go on there’s no way I will ever know the truth here much less be able to find this child,” Teaspoon spoke starting to feel a little helpless about the idea that he may have fathered a child that could possibly still be alive, that he may never know.
“I’m sorry, Teaspoon. I thought the news of a child would cheer up your day.”
“Jack, I’m happy that you got it all out in the open, but the news doesn’t bring me much joy. How would you feel thinking you have a child somewhere that you deserted before that child was even born?”
“You’re asking the wrong man that question, Hunter. I actually wouldn’t be surprised to find out that I do indeed have a few children running around somewhere. But, to be honest, I feel those children are better off without me. I’m not the fathering type.”
Jane walks back into Buck’s room. For a long moment she stands in the doorway caressing his body with the warmth of her eyes. She loves him. Her face is stained with the many tears that have recently fallen from her eyes. The bright redness of her eyes, from all the crying that she’s been doing lately, are sore and itchy.
She continues to watch Buck sleep so peacefully. Just a few days ago his sleep had been filled with painful moans in the middle of the night as well as during the day.
She can’t stop her thoughts of his being gone from her life. She knows that she wouldn’t be able to face losing another man from her life that she loves so deeply. Even though Doc Barnes has assured her many times since Buck has awoken from his deep unconscious state that he is going to be all right, Jane can’t stop the thinking that pounds in her mind. Buck has lost a lot of blood, just like Ike had lost a lot of blood. Buck nearly lost his own life from grief when Ike had died. Jimmy had told her that Buck wasn’t himself for a very long time. That is how she felt when her Papa had left her alone in this world. Buck was actually the person that helped her cope with her Papa’s death, but then Buck left her. They were young then, perhaps to young to realize that there was already a special bond between them. She can’t bear the thought of ever losing him!
Buck stirs in his bed as Jane wipes the last of her tears away from her damp face.
Buck’s eyes light up when he sees Jane standing in the doorway. He holds out his hand for her to come to him. “Come here,” Buck spoke barely above a whisper.
Jane hesitates a moment and then almost clumsily walks to stand at his bedside.
Instantly Buck can sense that Jane has been crying, and not only crying, but crying for a very long time. Her eyes are almost swollen shut from the tears that have spilled from them.
“What’s wrong?” Buck asked concerned for the woman he loves.
Jane can’t seem to get the words to form that she must say to him. She can only look at him wondering how she would ever live without him if he should ever die from the bullet of an outlaw’s gun!
Buck caresses her hand gently. “You can tell me what it is that’s upsetting you. I’m sure that whatever it is we can fix it.”
“Can we fix you Buck?” Jane asked angrily.
Buck is confused and it shows on his face. “I’m going to be fine, Jane. I just need a week maybe two to get my strength back.”
“What about the next time, and the time after that? Can you promise me that you will always come back home alive?” Jane asked tears flowing from her eyes.
Buck looks defeated. There is no way anyone, who chases after outlaws, knows whether they will come back home with or without a bullet hole in him. “Jane, I know that my getting shot has you upset. Teaspoon and Kid both told me how you have stayed by my bedside every day and night since they brought me home.”
“I don’t think Buck that I could ever do this again.”
“I can’t promise you that this won’t happen again. Even if I were to quit as Teaspoon’s deputy, there is a chance that this could happen again.”
Jane pulls her hand gently out of Buck’s grasp. “We can no longer be together,” Jane speaks so softly that Buck is unsure of her words. Jane turns from him. She can’t bear to see the tremendous amount of pain that is in his dark ebony eyes. Jane runs from the room.
“Jane!” Buck hollered as he tries to sit up in the bed only to be brought back down from the excessive pain in his chest. “Jane!”
Doc Barnes hears Buck’s yells from another room. He comes rushing into Buck’s room to make sure the Kiowa isn’t out of bed, which is what his mind is suspecting.
Teaspoon enters Doc Barnes clinic, and abruptly runs right into Jane as she’s trying to make her escape out the front door from the emotional pain that she is causing the man she loves.
“Jane?” Teaspoon spoke questioningly as she makes her way past him and out the door. Teaspoon watches after her for a moment, but then he hears the commotion back in Buck’s room. He secures the front door, and walks quickly back to where he still hears Buck calling Jane’s name.
Teaspoon enters Buck’s room thinking that Jane’s tears where due to the fact that something terrible had happened to Buck. The doctor looks up at Teaspoon when he enters.
Buck is lying quietly on his bed. Doc Barnes figures it is safe for him to talk with Teaspoon for a moment. He walks over to Teaspoon.
“I think perhaps they may have had a disagreement, but Buck seems pretty upset. Perhaps you can get him to quiet down and get some rest.”
“Sure thing, Doc.
Doc Barnes leaves Teaspoon alone with Buck. Teaspoon stands back and watches Buck for a moment. He seems to be blindly staring off somewhere. There are a few tears that have cascaded down his face. Teaspoon knows before he even approaches Buck that what took place between him and Jane had to have been worse than a disagreement. A disagreement wouldn’t cause Buck this much pain.
Teaspoon sits on the edge of Buck’s bed. He doesn’t say anything to Buck. He brings the Kiowa up into his arms in an embrace.
Doc Barnes sits quietly at his desk going over some medical notations concerning his patients. He hears a light rapping on his open office door. He glances over to see Teaspoon standing in the doorway looking like a beaten, worn man. “Come on in Teaspoon.”
“When can I take Buck home?”
“Let him stay here tonight. If he doesn’t have a setback from the obvious emotional pain that he is in, he can go home tomorrow morning.”
“I’ll be here bright and early to pick him up.”
“Make sure you bring the buckboard, and someone else to sit with him in the back. I don’t want him riding for a few weeks.”
“I’ll see you in the morning, Doc,” Teaspoon spoke disheartened.
“Teaspoon, is Buck alright?”
“He’s a bit confused, but we’ll get things settled between the two of them as soon as we can get him home. Good-night Doc.”
Goodnight Teaspoon.
Jane comes running into the Hunter household and practically flies up the stairs to her bedroom. Once there she throws herself on the bedroom. “Oh Buck, I’m so sorry,” Jane cried, as tears flow fiercely down her face.