STANDING
BETWEEN LOVE AND BETRAYALSTANDING
BETWEEN LOVE AND BETRAYAL
Every move that Buck makes causes her heart to race! Her eyes travel the length of his body from his rich dark brown hair all the way down to his booted feet. There isn't a single inch of his body that is uneasy on her eyes. Jane closes her eyes and thinks back to the feel of his warm hands caressing every inch of her body until the uncontrollable aching he was bestowing onto her reached a violent climax that left Jane completely satisfied, but wanting more of him!
Jane remembers how she had initiated their lovemaking the second and third time. She certainly didn't have to arouse any desire in Buck. Her single touch to his body caused Buck to shudder with desire for her. At first the intensity of their lovemaking had frightened her, but now Jane's only thoughts are how she is going to live the rest of her life never feeling that intensity, that passion, and that heat again!
The wind hitting harshly against the pane of glass in front of her causes Jane to jump out of her naughty thoughts of Buck Cross. Jane watches Buck intensely as he and Kid are guiding their horses out of the barn and into the pasture. The horses are in need of much fresh air before the billowing winds, and the immeasurable amounts of snow due to winter keep them confined to the barn most of the day and night.
Already the late autumn wind is whipping briskly around the two men as they unleash the horses from the confinement of the barn.
Kid has kept his mouth shut concerning the morning that Buck had brought Jane back to the ranch after he had stole her away from the ranch. He knows that his adoring wife was in on the entire ordeal that has in the end caused Buck more heartbreak. Like everyone else, Kid suspects that Buck and Jane were finally able to consummate the deep love that they feel for one another. The only problem with Buck and Jane giving in to their desires is that Jane upon being forced to deal with Cody's fierce temper went back to him claiming her undeniable love for Cody, and not for Buck.
Kid watches Buck knowing that his mind isn't really on his work. His friend hasn't really smiled much the past two weeks since his overnight stay with Jane out in the wilderness.
"I wish you would talk about what it is that's bothering you," Kid spoke his voice almost demanding that Buck open up to him.
"There's really nothing to talk about," Buck spoke stubbornly.
"Like hell there isn't!"
Kid's tone of voice has Buck halting the mission he is trying to finish, and instead he reluctantly gazes at Kid.
"Jane has made her choice. I'm not going to stand in the way of that choice any longer. I tired to make her see that we belong together, but I guess my trying wasn't convincing enough," Buck spoke disheartened.
Kid makes a motion with his eyes toward the window that Jane is peering out of.
"Is that why Jane can't stop watching every move you make? Open your eyes Buck. Her eyes follow you everywhere you go."
"Jane isn't watching every move I make."
Kid points up at Jane's bedroom window.
Buck looks at Kid with a confused expression, but then he turns quickly, but he only witnesses curtains flowing back into place in front of the window. He sees the shadow of a figure walk slowly away from the window. Buck turns his head to view Kid.
"I've noticed Jane peeping on you a lot lately over the past couple of weeks," Kid spoke knowingly.
"It's all in your head, Kid. Jane is infatuated with Cody. She has no interest in me at all."
"Jane certainly took interest in you the night you kidnapped her," Kid spoke assumingly.
"I never really told you what happened that night. You're only assuming what you hope happened," Buck spoke disheartened.
"When you brought Jane back the next morning, you both looked as if your love had been renewed. It was obvious to everyone, including Cody, that the two of you didn't spend the night arguing," Kid spoke amusingly.
Buck's eyes glisten over with moisture as he recalls the night of loving and passion between him and Jane. "Yeah. Well you're right. We didn't spend the night arguing, far from it actually."
"That's what I thought," Kid spoke smiling, as he slaps Buck on the back with his approval of Buck's actions with Jane.
The two men walk into the barn ready to start the day's work.
Jane makes her way down the stairs and the smell of turkey and other substantial Thanksgiving Day flavors instantly make their way to her nostrils. She halts her proceedings into the dining area and braces her stomach with her hand and heaves slightly. She is somewhat confused by her brief feeling of nausea, but the feeling leaves her quickly.
After the nausea eases, Jane bustles quietly into the kitchen where she stumbles upon Rachel all alone preparing the feast for the Holiday.
"Do you need a hand, Rachel?"
Rachel who is at the oven basting the turkey turns around abruptly to face Jane. "That is the best thing I've heard all morning." She smiles warmly at Jane, but then quickly returns to pay attention to the bird she is roasting.
"I would have thought that Louise would be over helping out."
Rachel slides the roaster back into the oven and shuts the oven door. She turns back around to face Jane. Rachel brushes her hand across her forehead to wipe off the moisture gathering there from the steam that came from the roaster. "She'll be over soon. You've been keeping pretty much to yourself lately. I haven't had much of a chance to chat with you."
"I have to admit I've been avoiding just about everyone," Jane spoke softly.
Rachel walks to the sink and continues cutting up vegetables for the salad that she had started to prepare before attending to the turkey. "Ever since your little argument with Louise?"
"I wouldn't exactly call it an argument. We just don't agree on who I'm in love with and who I'm not in love with. I'm sure you don't agree with my choice either."
"Jane, no one can tell you who to love. All of us hopeless romantics around here had just thought that we saw an undying love between you and Buck."
Louise walks into the kitchen carrying a large basket full of goodies for the Thanksgiving Day dinner. "Good morning Jane, Rachel."
"Good morning Louise," Jane spoke smiling brightly.
"Good morning Louise. What do you have good in that basket?" Rachel asked with a starving expression.
Louise begins to unpack the basket. She first takes out one each of an apple and pumpkin pie.
Rachel makes her way over to the counter and peeps underneath the cloth coverings over the pie plates. "They look simply delicious, Louise."
Jane takes one look at the pumpkin pie and begins to feel the heaving feeling in her stomach again. She grasps her stomach tightly and stumbles out of the kitchen.
She leaves both Louise and Rachel confused by her actions. They both stare at Jane until she disappears out the back door and into Rachel's garden.
"I guess she needed a quick breath of fresh air," Louise spoke unknowingly. She takes the pies and places them on a counter by the sink well out of the reach of young children's hands.
Rachel continues to gaze at the closed back door that leads to her garden. She wonders about the brief bout of nausea that Jane had just suffered through. Later her plans will be to question Jane on her brief need for fresh air.
Buck had finished with the morning chores rather quickly feeling the need to get back to the house to celebrate the day with his Pony Express family. The thought of having to deal with Cody all day had almost made him think about spending the day at the marshal's office, but Teaspoon had convinced Buck that he and Rachel would have a lousy holiday if he weren't present.
Buck decides to wash up at the well that is located at the back of the Hunter house. The well that Rachel uses to water her many blossoming flowers in the spring and summer seasons of the year.
Jane watches Buck silently from behind him as he washes off the morning chores from his hands and face. He uses an old towel from the barn that he had carried along with him to dry off.
When Buck turns around to head into the house his eyes meet the eyes of the woman that haunts his days, and torments his nights.
He notices how Jane has her hands clasped in front of her trying to ward off the bitter cold air.
"Kind of chilly for you to be out here without a coat on," Buck spoke as he sheds his coat from his body and drapes it around Jane.
As soon as Buck's body presses gently against her own, Jane feels so hot that the idea of a coat stifles her breathing.
Buck promptly notices the gasps of air that are between him and Jane. It is a known fact that the two of them can't get within a few feet of each other without passion heating up between the two of them.
Buck decides to use the moment to his advantage. After draping the coat around her shoulders, he brings his hands around the front of her face and lightly caresses her cheeks and throat.
Jane moves her head backwards to give Buck complete access to the flesh of her throat. She closes her eyes and dreams of the two of them without clothing coming between them, lying on a bed passionately entangled with one another!
As Buck slips his hands around her waist and pulls her close to him, Jane suddenly realizes that Cody could be on his way over to the Hunter home at any moment! She pushes Buck away from her heated body!
Buck is once again confused, but this time he doesn't plan on letting Jane off the hook by simply walking away from her with hurt feeling like he normally has done in the past.
"I'd really like to know what the hell you see in Cody?" Buck spoke angrily.
Jane has to think about the question that Buck has thrown her way. She is well aware that it is an effort on Buck's part to try and make her realize what they have between the two of them that is obvious to everyone that she doesn't have with the blonde past Pony Express Rider.
"I see in Cody a man that knows what he wants and he goes after what he wants. Nothing holds Cody back from getting what he wants."
A naughty smile plays across Buck's face. "Oh. So then you're saying that I should just take whatever it is that I want."
Jane answers Buck without thinking about the ramifications that her answer will bring her. "Yes."
Buck grabs Jane to him and kisses her passionately not allowing Jane to react by walking away from him. When he hears soft moans of desire coming from her, and feels Jane pull him close and hold him tightly to her, Buck pulls her close to his body and suddenly Jane feels like a prisoner to the intoxicating hunger for him that he embeds deep in her soul!
Buck's coat slides from Jane's shoulders and onto the ground as the heat of the encounter once again becomes unbearable. She feels his manhood begin to strengthen with every movement she makes against his body! She hears the deep moans come in succession from deep within him! Jane brings her hands around the front of Buck where she fumbles to unbutton his shirt!
Buck tenses up. He can't allow this to happen between them because making love to Jane is not a promise that they will share a life together. Since a lifetime promise is what he wants and needs from her, he halts their kiss.
Now it is Jane's turn to be confused by Buck's actions. She watches him as he picks his coat up from the ground.
"You don't want me?" Jane asked confused.
"I want you for a lifetime. The problem here is that you don't want me for the same length of time. I can't keep doing this. I can't make love to you, and then the second it's over you're running into Cody's arms! I can't believe that you can even turn your feeling on and off that quickly. But, I can't do that!" Buck spoke adamantly.
Jane tries to reach out to Buck. He in turn backs up from her. Jane stops when she notices the overwhelming amount of pain echoing in Buck's eyes.
"I don't turn my feelings for you on and off as quickly as you might think I do."
"Then why are you always running back to Cody? What? Are you afraid that I won't love you for a lifetime?"
Jane tries to walk past Buck to get into the house. Buck grabs hold of her arm and turns to face Jane.
"Don't walk away from us," Buck spoke as he searches the depth of her eyes telling him that she truly does love him. "I love you and my love for you is forever. I'll never be able to love another woman as much as I love you."
The haunting look in Jane's eyes causes Buck to loosen his grasp on her slightly. Jane doesn't want Buck to back away from her. All she really wants is to take him inside to his bedroom, and make love to him. Her mind has been clouded with memories of the cave and their intense night of lovemaking ever since the second he had brought her back onto the ranch. Jane forces her body tautly close to his. She reaches her hands around to Buck's head and neck. She slowly reaches her lips to his, and begins to ignite another fire deep in Buck's soul.
Buck follows Jane's lead and swoops his arms around her waist. The two are so wrapped up in the sensations that they are making each other feel that they are oblivious to their surroundings.
Buck and Jane suddenly tear they lips away from one another, and gaze toward the back door when they hear it slam shut. Cody stands boldly in front of the two that are showing their deep love for one another.
Buck looks back at Jane. She doesn't utter a single word of love to him. Buck slowly lets go of her arm and walks away from Jane and Cody. He makes his way into the house through the back door not feeling guilty at all by the problems that he may just have caused Jane.
Cody walks over to stand in front of Jane who hasn't taken her eyes off the closed back door that Buck just went through.
Cody reaches a hand down to her saddened face and forces Jane to look up into his eyes. "Am I ever gonna be able to make you forget about him?"
"Are you going to try?" Jane asked, her voice shaken from her heated encounter with Buck, and from the unsatisfied love that is between them.
"I thought I was trying. But, the way he just walked out of here and the look in your eyes tells me that I might as well give up on my quest to capture your heart."
Rachel had made the dining area into a feast of all feasts. She had brought two tables together to create a cozy family atmosphere that she had hoped would bring all them close together again as a family.
Unfortunately the sitting arrangements were not to Cody's liking at all. Rachel had Teaspoon sitting at one end of the table while she had placed her self at the other end. On the front door side of the table, Rachel had seated Addison and Daniel close to her. Next to the two young Hunter boys she had placed Jimmy, Louise, Kid, and Buck next to Teaspoon at the other end. On the opposite side of the table next to Teaspoon, Rachel had placed Jane, Cody, Charlene, Abigail and Emma, Kid and Lou's two girls, and finally Jack she placed next to her. Since that first introduction to Jack, Rachel has become quite pleased that Jack has stayed on in Rock Creek as long as he has. She finds his stories of the past humorous and exciting, and they also have kept her family from fighting amongst themselves on one or two occasions.
Jane had said grace and immediately afterwards the table had become a frenzy of hands passing dish after dish around the enormous table until everyone had a plate full of the holiday meal.
Jack had been the first to dig in and taste the tender turkey that Rachel had baked to perfection.
"Anytime Teaspoon that you want to give this lady away, I would be more than pleased to take her off your hands," Jack had spoke with a teasing smile aimed at Rachel.
"I think I'll be keeping her around for a lifetime," Teaspoon spoke adamantly.
"Cody, when are you planning on sending for a judge so you can get this trail for Hannah over and done with?" Jack asked demandingly.
"I'm just trying to tie up a few lose ends. A judge has already been summoned, but he is booked with other trails until a week from tomorrow," Cody spoke softly trying desperately not to arouse the anger in Charlene concerning her sister's plight.
"The truth is that Cody here doesn't have enough evidence to bring Hannah to trail," Jimmy spoke assuredly.
"I have more than enough evidence. Your problem Jimmy is that after turning Hannah in to the law, you're feeling guilty as hell about the fact that she will hang after you've spent numerous weeks sleeping with her," Cody spoke angrily.
"Cody! I would prefer the dinner conversation be a bit more suited for the young ears that are seated at this table," Rachel spoke adamantly.
Cody gazes down at the busy faces toward Rachel's end of the table eating their dinner. "I think the young ones are busy digesting their dinner, Rachel. I don't think they are paying much attention to the adult conversation that is going on," Cody spoke with a smile.
"Cody, you heard Rachel, mind your manners or exit yourself from the table," Kid spoke with authority.
Cody becomes quiet, and takes the time to notice that through all the babbling he endured with Rachel that Buck and Jane are having a rather difficult time taking their eyes off one another. Their plates are both completely full. It seems to Cody that their only hunger is for one another.
Cody clears his throat giving Jane the opportunity to peel her eyes away from Buck.
"I'm sorry Cody. Did you say something?"
Buck can only smile at the obvious way in that he had distracted Jane, causing Cody to become embarrassed by the way his woman can't keep her eyes off other men.
"Are you ready?"
"Cody, give Jane a chance to enjoy her meal. We just sat down," Lou spoke smiling over abundantly.
"Momma, can we please be excused?" Abigail asked softly.
The sound of Abigail's soft child voice causes all the adults to quiet their mouths from chewing and talking. Louise gets up from the table and walks around the other side to her two daughters.
"Of course you can be excused. I'm so proud of both of you. You finished everything on your plates."
"Momma can we be excused too. We ate everything on our plates too," Addison asked loudly.
All the adults except for Cody laugh at Addison's plea to be excused from the table.
"Wipe off your mouths and then you may be excused. Perhaps the four of you would like to go outside and play," Rachel spoke in a motherly tone.
All four children slide out from their chairs and race for the front door.
"Make sure you stay in the front yard," Kid spoke with authority.
Jimmy gets up from his chair and closes the door behind the four spirited children. Louise sits back down in her chair next to Kid. The entire family goes back to eating their meal for a few minutes in absolute silence.
Jack and Teaspoon both watch over the situation brewing at the table. The clatter of silverware to enamel plates, with no conversation, eventually gets on both Teaspoon and Jack's usually calm nerves.
"Jack when do you think you'll be ready to resume your unique line of work?" Jimmy asked trying to break up the silence at the Thanksgiving Day table.
"Doc says maybe a few more days and I'll be able to ride for days at a time. I actually feel great, but the doc is just being a bit over-cautious. Why do you ask Jimmy?"
"I was thinking that maybe I could give you a hand bringing in Jesse and his ruthless gang of outlaws," Jimmy spoke assuredly.
"Jimmy that might not be such a good idea," Louise spoke softly.
Jimmy looks at Louise in a confused manner, and so does just about everyone else at the table.
"I figured most of you wouldn't want me healthy and able to continue my search for Jesse," Jack spoke quizzically.
"Jesse no longer has a home here," Teaspoon spoke adamantly as he takes an uneasy glance at Buck knowing that the outcome of Jesse's shooting Buck could have ended up being a lot more tragic then what it was.
"Teaspoon, you don't have to act like you don't still care about Jesse in front of me," Buck spoke softly.
"Jack, I would prefer that when you do find Jesse and his gang that you take them to Plum Creek for their trail. That is actually the last town where they robbed the bank and shot the marshal," Teaspoon spoke calmly.
An uneasy silence clouds over the room. Jimmy glances around the room at his family. Jesse who had once been a scrawny kid that they were all a little over-protective of has turned into their worst enemy. Jimmy gazes back at Jack. " Actually Teaspoon, Jesse's last shootout was with us, and he shot one of Rock Creek deputies. The offer still stands Jack. If I can be of help in any way with the James Gang, just let me know."
"I'll keep that in mine Jimmy."
The family of the Kid & Buck Horse Ranch finishes their Thanksgiving Day meal in silence except for the clatter of silverware against enamel plates.