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Chapter 3
Til Birth Does Us Part
Chapter 3
Teaspoon sat next to Rachel on the swing. For a couple of minutes they were quiet. He sipped coffee from his cup and waited for her to say what's on her mind. He knew it would somehow have something to do with Louise.Oh, Louise, he thought, what did you get yourself into this time? He loved that girl and admired her. It frightened him to see her, the one that was always so strong, so weak.
"Rachel, you wanted to tell me something." He said after the silence became unbearable.
"Yes. But I don't know where to begin."
"What's wrong with her?" Teaspoon had a feeling Lou was in the middle of Rachel's thoughts.
"Oh, Teaspoon." Rachel started. "The poor girl's in so much trouble. I don't know how to help her."
Teaspoon looked at her. There were tears in her eyes. "What happened, Rachel?"
Rachel took a deep breath before answering. She fixed her eyes on the horizon ahead. "Teaspoon, you must keep this a secret. No matter what. She doesn't want anybody else to know."
"What is it, Rachel?" Teaspoon checked her face.
"She's pregnant, Teaspoon." Rachel said, still not looking at him.
Teaspoon's mouth hanged open. "Pregnant?" He asked, not believing.
Rachel nodded. "Two month."
"Oh, my God." Teaspoon said. "Did she tell the Kid yet?"
"No, Teaspoon. She's not planing on either."
"But she has to. He's the father, isn't he?"
Rachel nodded again. "I told her he has a right to know, but she wouldn't listen. She doesn't want him to know."
They sat silent for a few minutes, before Rachel started again. "She said she's leaving."
"Leaving?"
"She doesn't want the Kid to find out and she also said that since she can't ride, she has nothing to stay here for."
"Nothing to stay here for? What about her family? What about her friends? And where would she go? She has no place else."
"She said she'll write Emma, ask her to stay with her and Sam." After a few seconds of silence she continued. "So, are you going to fire her?"
Teaspoon looked at her shocked. "Fire her?"
"She can't ride, Teaspoon. That's why she hadn't rode Lightning on the way here."
"How did she get here then?"
"She came here in a stage." Both Rachel and Teaspoon were startled to see the Kid right there on the porch with them.
"How long have you been standing here?" Rachel asked afraid that heard things he wasn't suppose to.
"I just arrived here. Why?" he asked suspiciously.
"Nothing important, son." Teaspoon said. "What were you saying about the stage?"
"I said Lou came by stage. I met a girl at town. She and her husband just arrived from Seneca by stage and guess who was on the stage with them."
Teaspoon just sighed and glanced at Rachel who had tears in her eyes once again.
"What's wrong with her, Rachel?" The Kid asked feeling that something was wrong.
"Nothing, son. Nothing." Teaspoon answered as he still looked at Rachel.
Rachel cleared her throat. "Kid, would you please get the boys, dinner will be ready in a few minutes. We'll eat at the house tonight."
"Sure, Rachel." Kid said as he headed toward the barn, a bad feeling in his heart.
After he called the boys for dinner, the Kid went to the bunkhouse to hang his gun belt. He took a minute to look at the sleeping Lou before walking toward his bunk. He longed to hold her and kiss her but she wasn't his to hold and kiss anymore. And he had another girlfriend now… Samantha… How could he give all hope with Lou for her?
Lou stirred and woke up. She opened her eyes and looked at him. Immediately she had tears in her eyes. Kid felt guilty for making her cry again.
"Lou…" He started but she turned her back at him.
He sighed. "I've met Eli Smith at town earlier today. She said she might come and visit you sometime."
Lou stiffened as she heard this. "Who's Eli Smith?" she lied. She remembered the pretty woman very well.
"She's the girl you traveled with in the stage from Seneca. You know, the pretty girl that just got married." Kid had more than a bit sarcasm in his voice. He knew she was lying and she knew he knows.
"Rachel said dinner's ready." He said after a couple of minutes, just before he walked out.
"So why won't you go then?" Lou said harshly. She just wanted to be left alone, especially by him.
"I'm going. But before that, would you tell me why you took the stage and didn't just ride home?"
"I thought you would be happy that I took a safer transportation." She said sarcastically.
"Lou," he sighed, "You never cared much about my feelings when we were together. Don't start now." He didn't wait for her to answer and just walked out.
Lou looked at the door even after he left. How dare he say that? She didn't care? She wasn't the one with a new boyfriend.
While they were all sitting at the table, Teaspoon excused himself. He wanted to talk to Lou alone, without the boys coming and going.
Jimmy watched him as he walked outside the door. "Rachel," He started, "have you found out anything about Lou?"
Kid stiffened in his sit. "She took the stage here." He said without looking up from his plate.
"And how would you know?" Jimmy asked arrogantly.
Kid looked up and stared right into his eyes. And this is my best friend… he thought. "I met someone that was on the same stage with her." He finally said.
Rachel felt the tension between the two and decided to interfere. "the woman that Kid met said Lou didn't seem too well so she wanted to check on her, that's all. Now boys, I don't want to discuss the matter any more tonight." When she saw the Kid relax she said more quietly, "Now finish your dinner."
The boys each looked at his plate. The Kid couldn't eat and just played with his food. Occasionally Jimmy watched him, ready to pick up another fight in Lou's name.
Teaspoon knocked on the door of the bunkhouse before opening. He stepped in quietly, not wanting to frighten her. He saw her sleeping on one of the bunks. She didn't seem comfortable in this bunk that wasn't hers. She was curled with her legs to her chest, breathing fast. He took a chair and sat beside her. He wanted to touch her and hug her and make everything O.K. again for this brave woman who now seemed to be even tinnier than he has ever seen her before. However he just sat there looking at her for a moment before he woke her up, whispering her name. Lou stirred before fully waking up. He smiled at her lovingly. She tried to smile back but didn't quite succeed. She knew why he was there. He's going to fire me, she thought.
"Lou…" he started. It was so hard. When he took the job for Russell, Majors & Waddell, no one warned him he would fall in love with all those boys and women he worked with. And of-course no one warned him of falling in love with a young great lady that stole every heart of every man she met. And no one warned him of the problems he would have to help them deal with…
Lou decided to make it easier on him. "It's O.K., Teaspoon. I'm leaving anyway."
Teaspoon looked at her, with sad eyes. "No one here wants you to leave, Lou. I'm not firing you."
"I can't ride." She was relived that she didn't have to repeat her story to him.
"Louise… remember what I told you all when I first found out about you? Company's company, and family's family. And I always thought of you all as family. You are family Lou, and the rest of it is here."
"And now this family's getting bigger…" Lou tried to lighten the subject but it only brought tears to her eyes.
"Aren't you going to tell this baby's father about it?" Teaspoon hoped she would change her mind about this. Kid was also a member of his family, even thought he might have made a mistake by seeing that southern woman.
Lou shook her head. "Hasn't Rachel explained this to you?"
"She did," He admitted, "I just hoped you've changed your mind."
"In a couple of weeks he would probably ask Samantha to marry him. I don't want to come between them just because of this baby."
"Don't you think he would like to know?"
"Why? So he could be noble again? And what about Samantha? She's not the one who has to suffer because of a mistake the Kid and I made."
Teaspoon was overwhelmed. She tried to do the right thing for the woman that took her place. "You don't have to go through this alone, Lou."
"I've been alone most of my life, Teaspoon. I think I can manage this too."
"I don't doubt that you can, but you have to think of this baby too. Don't you want it to have the father that it deserves? Do you want it to grow without a father like you did?"
Lou knew what he said was true. She always promised herself her children won't be orphans. "I'm not sure Kid is the one I want as a father for my child." She said honestly.
"You had so much love for each other, Lou. It can't have just disappeared." Teaspoon saw it in their eyes. He knew the both of them still loved each other. He had a lot of experience in this field…
"You really think so?" Lou asked doubtfully. "I'm not sure what love is anymore. I'm not sure that we ever loved." She started crying.
Teaspoon decided to leave the Kid out of the conversation, talking about him caused so much pain to her. "Where did you think of going, then?"
"I thought I would write to Emma. Do you think she'll have me there?"
"Why not? You know she loved you as a daughter."
"But I never was pregnant before." Lou said. "She's a respected woman, and I'm not even close to this category."
Teaspoon knew how hard explaining this baby's going to be for her. "Emma's your friend," He said, "she won't judge you for this."
"You know, Teaspoon, I used to. I thought that girls that… you know… I thought them to be immoral. I thought myself better than them. I guess I'm not, am I?" she said as she began to sob again.
"Louise, you remember Amanda, don't you?"
Lou just nodded.
"Well, her mother and I weren't married. Does that make either one of us or Amanda count less?"
"Of-course not, Teaspoon, but that's what others think."
"What do you care what others think?"
"Cause no man would ever want anything to do with a woman who has a child which father is a mystery."
"You can discover this mystery, Lou."
"No! Please don't tell him, Teaspoon. I don't want him to know."
"I already promised Rachel I won't tell. Don't worry about that. But please think of what you're going to do some more, I don't want you to leave and I don't think any of the boys does." She opened her mouth to protest but he just continued. "Even the Kid."
He stood up. "You better rest now. I'll tell the boys to be quiet. Good night" he then left the bunkhouse.
When Teaspoon entered the house he was surprised to find there was still some food left. The boys stared at him as he sat in his chair and started eating. He avoided them for moments that seemed like eternity.
Finally Jimmy couldn't stand the silence any more. "Is she any better?" He asked.
The Kid looked at him. Maybe he's the one Lou would marry. He obviously care a lot about her, maybe even love her, He thought. But, Lou, no one would ever love you the as much as I loved you. He didn't want to admit it even to himself but he still loved her, even though they broke up.
"She will be," Teaspoon answered, "if you won't hustle her. Please don't annoy her with your questions."
"But what is it?" Noah asked.
Teaspoon gave them all a hard glare. "She'll talk when she's ready. For the time being just leave her alone."
They all looked ashamed for their impatience.
"Rachel, may I be excused?" the Kid asked after a couple of seconds.
Rachel nodded her head and he got up.
"Off to visit your sweetheart, Kid?" Jimmy couldn't resist.
Kid stopped for a moment but then headed out the door.
Teaspoon sighed. "You know, Jimmy, I never thought you would behave so stupidly."
Jimmy just stared at teaspoon, sure of his doings. He stood up. Why do I have to listen to this? He thought.
"Sit down!" Teaspoon growled at him. "Where do you think you're going?"
"Outside." Jimmy said. "Why? Only he can go out?"
"Sit down, Jimmy." Noah tried to calm him down.
"Why do you all care so much about my doings?" Jimmy asked them, his voice high.
"Jimmy," Rachel tried. "What's the matter?"
"What's the matter? What's the matter? Don't you see? The matter is the Kid keeps hurting her and hurting her, and no one here seem to mind."
"Jimmy, the Kid has a right to go on living even though they broke up, and you know damn well why they broke up, and you know it wasn't really the Kid's fault." Teaspoon tried to reason.
"He shouldn't have pressured her like he did." Jimmy just wouldn't listen. He was so sure of his rightness.
"Jimmy," Noah interfered, "you're acting like a fool. Kid's your best friend and you're letting this friendship sink because of your feelings for Lou."
"What feelings?" Jimmy got defensive.
"Oh, Jimmy…" Rachel looked at him doubtfully, as if saying why do you keep denying it?
Jimmy returned the glare. "What? Lou and I are just friends. That's all." With that he left the house, afraid of being questioned any more.
Jimmy walked out of the house. Even though he would never admit it, he knew he wasn't right to come so hard on the Kid. It wasn't his fault he and Lou broke up. It wasn't anyone's fault. It just wasn't the right time for them. In his heart he missed his friend.
As he wondered through the station he saw a figure sitting on the fence of the corral. He walked closer. It was the Kid. He just sat there watching the dark.
"Hey." Jimmy said.
"I don't feel like fighting with you tonight, Jimmy. You will have to look someplace else."
"I didn't come to fight with you. Just thought you would like to talk."
Kid looked suspiciously at him. Is this his way to say he's sorry? He thought before he decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. "What about?"
"I don't know. You, Samantha."
Here he goes again. The Kid thought. Just can't leave her out of the conversation. He decided to try and play along. "What about her?"
It took Jimmy by surprise. He never thought the Kid would talk with him about her. "Um… I don't know. Your relationship, I guess."
"What do you want to know about it?"
"Well… don't you need anymore of those advises you used to need so much when you were with Lou?"
"You've already taught me everything there is to know, Jimmy." The Kid said sarcastically.
Jimmy sneered at that. He still remembered the time when Kid asked him for an advice about Lou. "Just dance" he told him then. At that moment Jimmy knew that it wasn't for him to come between the two of them, even if they weren't together anymore. "So, do you love her?" Jimmy was pretty curious about that.
Kid thought about it for a moment. "I don't know." He said honestly. Even though things weren't the way they used to be between the two of them, he knew Jimmy wouldn't use that against him. "She's a nice girl and all, but it's not like it was with Lou. You know what I mean?"
Jimmy nodded silently. "You still love Lou, don't you?"
"Don't you?" Kid asked back.
Jimmy looked at Kid for a sign of anger but find none. "She's a very special lady."
Kid didn't pressure him for more and just nodded his consent. "I would never find anyone like her. I don't want to either. What we had was special when we had it. I don't want a poor replica of it."
"Why did you break up then?" Jimmy asked though he knew the reasons for their break up very well.
"I pressured her and she wasn't ready. It's just that the way things were going between us… we had to get married before something might have happen."
"But did you love her enough to marry her?" Jimmy asked.
Kid just stared at him as if he's lost his mind. "Did I love her enough? Jimmy, what are you talking about? I loved her more than anything. More than life itself. Seeing Samantha is the thing that keeps me from loosing my mind. I thought you understood that."
Jimmy shrugged. "I don't know, Kid. It seemed kind'a strange - the way you started with Samantha so soon after your break up. It didn't seem right. It looked as if breaking up with Lou didn't count for much. I think that's the way Lou feels."
"Our relationship counted everything to me, Jimmy. You can tell her this."
"If she'll ever get over what's bugging her."
"What do you think it is?"
"Who knows? Probably nothing big, just a flu or something."
"Yeah." The Kid said. "Come on, let's go to sleep."
They jumped of the fence and walked together toward the bunkhouse.
When Jimmy and Kid entered the bunkhouse Ike was already sleeping, Lou was pretending. She was glad to see them coming in together… both alive…
"Where's Noah?" Kid asked.
"Probably helping Rachel clean after the dinner." Jimmy answered.
Kid stopped getting undressed to watch Lou. "Do you think she's going to be O.K.?" he asked.
"She better." Jimmy said. Or Cody will give her a hard time when he gets back, he thought.
